First of
all, if you disagree with my assessment, please feel free to post about it in
the comments section. And if you agree, please please post, because I’ve got a
feeling that this one’s gonna stir up some controversy.
It’s the
end of the world as we know it, and I feel . . . like I read this a few weeks
ago. It was called Tycho, and it was
about a whole lot of people—like, the entire population of the earth—dying because
of a biological weapon. It’s the same scenario this week, in A. L. Jambor’s But The Children Survived, except two
hundred pages longer and with many more narrators. When only a small group of
children appear immune to the plague, it’s up to a team of scientists, working
in an airtight biosphere in Florida ,
to uncover the mysterious machinations of the pharmaceutical company whose
greed doomed millions . . . and whose knowledge might yet hold the key to
humanity’s survival. But The Children
Survived is full of interesting ideas, but the excess of characters make it
hard to sympathize with anyone and the constant backstory slows the story to a
snail’s crawl.
Professional cover design! Love that! |
The
protagonist, Mindy, is staying at her grandmother’s house with her dog, Baby
Girl, when the apocalypse strikes. Terrified and alone, with only her
grandmother’s gun and old dog for protection, she forages for supplies in the
dead wasteland until a team of scientists in haz-mat suits drags her back to
their biodome. There, she finds food, shelter, and friends. Yet Mindy doesn’t
want to spend the rest of her life in the biodome—at least not until she knows
whether her parents are still alive. When loner Mark arrives at the biodome,
Mindy gets the chance to escape she’s been waiting for.
As the
story unfolds, we learn the history of every last scientist living at the
biodome. Christie, the only female scientist, suffered the loss of her husband
and child in a car accident. Gerald, another kooky researcher, had a bad break
up with his wife. While the backstory has its interesting points, it can be a
little tedious in parts. But The Children
Survived is roughly forty percent backstory of how the plague—and the
children’s immunity—came to be. You honestly have to love the characters to put
up with the slow pace, and the characters didn’t feel real enough to draw me
in. The author’s voice is the same for every character, and they all seem to
blend together after a while.
The journey of Antonio, an Italian scientist
seeking a cure for the pregnancy complication that took his mother’s life, is
one of the high points of the book. Antonio is a genuinely interesting
character, but the suspense of his quest is dampened by long, pointless asides.
There’s an entire chapter where Antonio’s wife looks for stud to breed her dog
with—a chapter that could have been summed up in one or two sentences. Likewise
with all the backstory about this pharmaceutical company. We learn early on in
the book that the apocalypse was caused by an insane scientist releasing the
weapon. The internal drama of this company, as compelling as it might be in
another setting, isn’t necessary because the readers already know that the
company and almost everyone who works for it is going to die, rendering it
pointless to the main story. Complex plots that are revealed in bits and pieces
can be good things, but only if the bits and pieces contribute to the main
story. One hundred and fifty pages could easily have been cut.
One
character, who struggles with a gambling addiction, has to make sense of a
world where money no longer has value. That’s an interesting, fresh idea—and
yet, it’s hard for me to sympathize with him. We’re told he ‘finds God’ through
caring for the orphaned children. Great for him. However, as a Christian woman,
I know that finding God can be an emotionally exhausting, painful, sometimes
euphoric process full of bumps along the way. But the words on the page don’t
evoke those emotions. Maybe they would for another reader, but the burden of
making me feel rests on the author’s shoulders alone.
The
author’s skill with tactile imagery only extends to, over and over, describing
how bad all the corpses smell and how after a few weeks they’re nothing but
bone and hair. It was a shocking image the first time I heard a rotting body
described in print—when I was, what, twelve? Now it’s routine. Encountering the
human body in decay should be sobering. It reminds us we only have so long to
live. These are characters encountering mortality in the most painful of ways
and yet few of them show any real trauma. None show symptoms of PTSD, not even
the children who have seen everyone they know and love drop dead around them.
This would be extremely traumatizing in real life. They would need therapy. They
would not be as playful and kind to each other as we see here.
When large
groups of real people are confined to close quarters, fights break out. Cliques
form. Leaders arise and so do challengers. Heck, you’ll get this in any dorm on
any college campus. These people are under way more stress than your average
college student and yet they all seem to get along fine. It’s tempting for an
author to make all their characters get along—if you like these characters
you’ve created, it follows that they must like each other. A little internal
tension would have gone a long way towards creating suspense. There’s one
disliked character in the group, but without major divisions, the story feels
artificial.
But The Children Survived is certainly
an ambitious undertaking. The backstory, even if it is mostly irrelevant to the
plot, is well organized and there weren’t too many plotholes I could spot. There’s
some good lines: “Joe’s inability to accept responsibility had always caused
him to create an alternate universe wherein he was the victim of everyone
else’s plots.” And there’s some genuinely creepy moments, involving test tubes
of the biological weapons referred to as ‘my babies’ and one man’s twisted love
of his cow. The author has a real gift for writing crazy characters that freak
me out—but the normal characters lack the spark of madness that make the crazy
ones shine.
Highs:
Mindy’s quest to find her parents. We really feel for this little girl who’s
all on her own and the author makes us hope her parents will survive. The
prologue. It has an excellent twist that really grabbed my interest. The
creepiness. Again, the author really made me shiver when I read about her
villains.
Lows:
Literal Chekov’s Gun. Mindy has a gun she took from her grandmother’s
collection. Yet she only uses it to shoot a rat. That should be foreshadowing,
not the only time that gun is ever used. Bad word choice. I would expect
something like “They were more than friends; they were brothers and sisters in
the trenches, akin to soldiers in war. All their inhibitions were gone, their
masks stripped away,” to fit erotica, not a meeting of children. Backstory. So
much of it could have been cut. Deleting scenes you love is part of being a
writer.
As apocalyptic
fiction, I give it three stars out of five. As a novel, two and a half. And if
you disagree, please feel free to voice your opinion in the comments section.
Thank you for reviewing my book, Liz. I respect your honesty. It was my very first endeavor and hopefully I've learned and improved!
ReplyDeleteI'd love to review one of your Pello Island books--they look very interesting.
ReplyDeleteI think this is another insightful review - I always look forward to book reviews on O43. The author has graciously acknowledged the review's opinion. To state my own position, I was chuffed to bits to have a review of my own work on here.
ReplyDeleteNot having read the book, I think the review does highlight something any self-published author needs to think about - editing. It sounds like there are sections in this book, which sound good in their own right, but needed cut. It's easy to say, I know, and not as easy to do.
This is a great review, Liz. Good job and keep up the good work. I always share your reviews on my G+ account.
Thank you, Eddie!
ReplyDelete